Monday, 23 March 2009

back on track 3rd time lucky

Since I havent posted since january it might not suprise anyone that we haven't been following cambridge! Its been unbelievably hard to get back on track. We've been starting fine on a Monday, all raring to go and then failing miserably and not even managing 3 days. To begin with we were doing well managing our food, not overeating making sensible choices, but the last few weeks the old behaviour crept in. Its so hard when we are both addicts. If one of us wants to overeat its just too easy to get the other to join in. Anyway tale of woe over, we finally tried to start again last monday and i can happily say we now have a whole successful week done. Once you've got a week under your belt its so much easier to carry on - its just getting through that first week is so tough. Good news is I've lost 17bs and kel 12lbs according to our home scales. but not sure how much we had put on - somewhere between a stone and a stone and a half. We've just had an official weigh in so we can get an official weigh loss next week. According to the cdc
i'm now 270.5lbs and the lowest i got to was 258 - a difference of 12.5 lbs
kel is now 233.5 and her lowest was 217.5 - a difference of 16 lbs

we're both fired up and ready to get that excess of and get back to losing more - wish us luck!

Saturday, 17 January 2009

round 2 day 6

Bloody nora weighed myself this morning and i'm back to where i was when we stopped cd for xmas. Its only taken a week to lose 14lbs. (yes i put on a stone in a month!). to lose so much so quick surely means its all water and glycogen stores which in effect means that when i do get to goal thats about how much i'll put back on naturally not overeating. I think it might be a good idea to get a bit lower than goal - especially since i've put my goal weight as the first weight that will get my bmi to 25! Mind you its not really an issue at the moment since i still have another 6 stone + to lose. I feel really positive about it - having already lost 7 stone I just need to carry on the same way.

Thursday, 15 January 2009

Round 2 day 4

Well by the taste in my mouth and the increase in energy i'd say i was defo in ketosis! Feel great and i've lost 8lbs already! i'm meant to be working but keep doing wedding stuff instead - naughty munch. check out the wedding blog here

Tuesday, 13 January 2009

Round 2 day 2

were back on 100% cambridge sole source as of yesterday. We tried and failed last week but i'm sure we will be fine this time. It was kels birthday at the weekend and i think we both knew we would eat so the motivation was completely lacking last week. I'm not in ketosis yet -i'm feeling starving but enjoying it in a wierd way but i'm also kind of grumpy - either from carb or nicotine withdrawal not sure which. I feel ok about everything though - even the few pounds that i've put on - i know if i can make it to day 4 it'll get easy again and once youve done a week of sole source you feel great and the weeks fly by. I'm thinking this time of sole sourcing for 12 weeks rather than the 4 weeks then an add a meal week but i havent discussed it with kel yet. I think the faster i can get to goal the better. At the beginning of last year i was a size 30 - 32 and i've begun this year a size 20 - 22 which is a fantastic achievement. when we started to come off cambridge in december i felt amazing about how i looked. I felt gorgeous! and that didnt really help to keep up with the diet. But i'm used to being this size now, its time to get to goal. We went to Cheshire Oaks yesterday and i bought a skirt from the Next Clearance shop - it was only £4 and a size 12!!! Optimism rules! God I cant wait to be a skinny munch x

Thursday, 18 December 2008

Ups and Downs

we've been struggling to stay on track the last couple of weeks. The pattern seems to be get weighed on a Sunday and eat Sunday and Monday night. Not good. And even worse eating hasn't just been limited to chicken salad this time. We've been visited by our good old friends chocolate and chinese. A bit of a disaster as far as ketosis is concerned. Wierdly the chinese wasn't anything like i remembered/ imagined, my palate must have changed. I cant say that i particularly enjoyed it for its taste - just the naughtiness of it. The chocolate on the other hand was DIVINE!
Looking at the positive side both weeks we have managed to get control and get back into the Cambridge diet relatively quickly. Our total weight loss to date is
munch 6stone 10lbs
kel 5stone 3lbs
probably best to focus on that positive news rather than the food!

At the beginning of this diet we were adamant that we wouldn't eat any other time except our eating weeks and even though Xmas fell on our eating week we would stick to Cambridge rules and not have carbs. Oh how we've changed! Its kels work do tomorrow so we are going and we are going to eat, there's a Xmas dinner party at friends on Sunday and we are going to eat there too, then we'll do ss until Xmas eve and then have a carby meal with mum, Xmas day we'll be as good as possible and just eat meals - no snacking on chocs or nuts - but there is no way i'm not eating my mums incredible Xmas cake and i'm not resisting the baileys either! Then we might eat on boxing day then ss until new years day wen we are having friends round. A bit different from our initial intentions! I'm not worried though which i was at the beginning. Before my mind was very black and white. either i sole soured or i overate. there was no middle ground of eating normally. And even though we have broken the diet and eaten, which i would class as addictive behaviour, i don't feel like I'm going to eat addictively through Xmas. I might be in complete denial but i feel as if we have eaten addictively in the last few weeks simply because we have been without food for so long and that if we did the version of Cambridge where you can have an evening meal we wouldn't have behaved the same. Not that i think I'm able to do that version long term and still lose weight - i know damn well I'm not capable of that yet without overeating eventually , but i think I'm now in control enough to be able to cope with carbs a few days over Xmas and still get back on cd ss for the rest of the weight loss. I hope i can anyway - there is a little monster in my right now saying 'but if you are eating on Sunday, Wednesday and Thursday why bother doing ss on Monday and Tuesday'. I'm not listening - he only knows how to behave addictively - i can chose to ss Monday and Tuesday so shut up! Does this diet shrink your brain? i sound like a right nutter!

oh and that terrible rumour has come true for me - my hair is dropping out at an alarming rate! its fine for me because I've got far too much anyway and its really thick hair but its very messy - it gets everywhere! kel is distinctly unimpressed with it 'dirtying' the house lol!

interesting article from the times online

From The Times
December 18, 2008

Tackle child obesity: teach mums to eat
A leading campaigner on food and fat has a simple solution for the Chief Medical Officer
Susie Orbach
Dear Sir Liam Donaldson,
You've been alerting us to the obesity time-bomb for nearly a decade.
And quite rightly. Obesity is the manifestation of a food- and size-obsessed society that most shows us we are in trouble where eating is concerned. The latest information from the EarlyBird Diabetes study of 233 children from birth to puberty, published in the journal Paediatrics, shows that one in four children aged 4 to 5 in England is overweight despite normal birth weights. But, says Terry Wilkin, the study's lead researcher, it is difficult to know what is causing the upsurge.
Difficult? Well perhaps. But not that difficult. You don't have to be a psychoanalyst to know that childhood is formative and that one's earliest eating experiences - entwined as they are with our fundamental feelings of security, love, attachment and caring - form the basis of how we approach food and succour throughout our lives.

Top of Form
Bottom of Form
Mothers strive to and want to give their children all that is best and most reassuring. But in many cases, this doesn't happen because mothers themselves are troubled by erratic eating, fear of food, preoccupation with body size, frequent dieting, and its sister - bingeing.
Babies and children mimic. That is a crucial part of how they learn. So it is surely no wonder that if babies or toddlers pick up on a fraught atmosphere around feeding and eating, they will take that as the norm. And it shouldn't surprise us that when the children become more independent eaters they will reflect what they have learnt not only in their eating choices, but in the emotional feelings of safety, anxiety, fear, pleasure or satisfaction that go with food.
People don't eat compulsively because they are hungry. People don't eat excessively because they forgot to exercise or balance their calorie output against their calorie input. People don't eat more than they need because they are just plain ignorant or bolshie.
People eat when they aren't hungry because they are bored, anxious, angry, conflicted, nervous, sad or overexcited. They reach out for something cheap and tasty that feels momentarily like a treat; something that takes their mind off what hurts. The upset feelings don't get dealt with; they sit there and the next time they emerge, the person will again turn to food for soothing.
This behaviour is learnt when we are little - whether it is by being rewarded with food, by being given food to cheer us up after falling down or by observing a mother who is constantly dieting but then eats off a child's own plate. Food becomes not food but something imbued with magically comforting properties.
Sir Liam, you are calling for early interventions. Thank goodness. But is anyone in the Department of Health listening? Will they now? For at least ten years, I have been pestering the department (as, I imagine, have others) with economical, nay cheap, plans to provide support to help new mothers not pass their eating problems on to their babies. Helping mothers to come to grips with their own eating difficulties is surely the sanest and most effective way to help two generations in one go.
It's not difficult to see how to train midwives and health visitors to take a more nuanced and psychobiological approach to expectant and new mothers so that their eating attitudes, habits and psychological issues are addressed rather than their being told to feed on the right breast for ten minutes and then the left.
No disrespect to health visitors; I know that they want to help new mothers and their babies but at present they are undertrained and too rushed to take the time really to address what mothers and babies need.
But it needn't be so. Compared with the cost of treatments for obesity-related diseases later in life and what will inevitably become, in time, a lucrative pill for the pharmaceutical companies, it makes sense to spend some money now by employing more health visitors and extending their training so that they can underpin the crucial parenting job of introducing a child to food and eating in a relaxed manner.
Sir Liam, these are messages that the Government must take on board and work with alongside the often (but not always) sound nutritional policies that it disseminates. New mothers are keen to get it right for their babies. Let's help them to get it right for themselves and reverse their own, often unseen, eating difficulties.
And Sir Liam, about that taboo word obesity. I'm not so sure that you're right on why it rubs people up the wrong way. It could just be that calling obesity a disease rather than a description of size, castigating rather than understanding people's complex relationship to food and patronising them with oversimplified slogans about “energy in, energy out”, makes the kind of changes that you would like to see in our attitude towards weight seem unappetising.
So please, Sir Liam, can I talk to you about implementing some programmes that stand a good chance of addressing the eating problems that beset so many - and that are contributing to the epidemic in the next generation.
As Erasmus told us nearly 500 years ago “young bodies are like tender plants, which grow and become hardened into whatever shape you've trained them”. He wasn't wrong where it comes to food. So let's train people to relish it rather than fear or laud it.
Yours in frustration and hope, Susie Orbach
Susie Orbach is author of Fat is a Feminist Issue and Bodies, to be published by Profile in January

Monday, 1 December 2008

good news - hurrah

at last! i'm now 18st 13. I am under 19 stone which i havent been for 12 years, basically since mini munch was born! I am so chuffed. last week was really difficult but i did what i said i would and had chicken salad for a few nights until by friday i felt ok to sole source. In total i have lost 6 stone 3lbs. definitely a huge achievement! yea me! A neighbour that we rarely see much of came over to talk to me this morning to tell me how different i look and to say how happy he was for me lol! loving it today!

Thursday, 27 November 2008


so monday and tuesday were awful after the ikea debacle on sunday. the addictive behaviour kicked in big time. I've talked about it (as all good self therapists should lol) and i think the fact that i ate in front of mum, she didnt really understand that eating week doesnt involve chips, made me feel all powerful and like i was 'getting away with it'. it gave me that buzz that secret eating used to. ON sunday night i had no idea that what i was saying about there being another 4 week stint till xmas and how motivated i felt about ss was just complete piffle. Monday night i binged. proper addictive behaviour. Tuesday i had all the good intentions in the world and was fine all day and yet the minute kel left for work that night i binged. again.
So my decision has been to follow the advice i'd read numerous times. if you are struggling to get back to ss then work down the plans. That doesnt mean i'm going to go up the plans tho first lol. the highest plan for me (other than at ikea) is add a meal so thats what i did last night. a very strict chicken, lettuce and cucumber. it worked. during the day if i had the addictive food thoughts they were easily banished with thoughts of the chicken to come. and after the salad i was fine too. a bit hungry but no binge. mind you kel was home so its much easier to stay on the str8 and narrow! Tonight is going to be the same and then i'm not sure about friday - we'll see how strong i feel. kel will be at on the late shift again. if on friday daytime i start having naughty thoughts about kel being out and nobody knowing what i eat then i will plan to have a salad. the thing about planing to eat as opposed to binging is a self esteem issue. if i plan to eat and plan a strict cambridge meal then when i eat it and nothing else with it the effect is positive. i feel good about myself. i took control and put a plan in motion so that i didnt binge. the effect of binging on your self esteem is the complete opposite and when you feel so low and have 'failed' its far to easy to do it again.